‘Tobias’- God is good!

I woke up from a dream that we were having another baby boy… It was 330am on January 31, 2018. I went to the bathroom, grabbed a home pregnancy test, peed on it and then took a shower. As I was drying off, I glanced at the stick and saw two red lines.

I cried.

I cried not because I didn’t want it but because I wasn’t expecting it. If you have been regularly reading my blog and instagram posts, you might remember that we have always wanted another baby since Noah turned 3 years old and have always expected each month for a positive home pregnancy test result, but it never came. (Read previous post about pregnancy Jesus Forgot Us? )

And so we trusted God that He knows what He is doing and that His timing is always perfect. -but it did not feel like very good timing when we got the positive home pregnancy test and then two weeks later at the doctor’s, when she confirmed that there was a sac but no little embryo yet, up to the point when we found out another two weeks later that yes, a baby is growing inside of me!

While the good news was very much welcomed, it was unplanned and we felt came at the wrong time as I was doing 2 regular shows that just started… but who are we to question God’s plan?

What a wonderful opportunity to learn to trust God that He is always right, that His timing is always perfect and that He will provide and strengthen us through this wonderful miracle. What a wonderful gift God is allowing us to have and experience. And we know whatever happens, God is in control and this God who is in control is a good good God, a good Father, who knows what we need and what is best for us.

Our new baby boy, Lord willing is due to arrive this September and we are naming him Tobias Nolan. Nolan means ‘Champion‘ and Tobias means ‘God is good‘ because He is!

It is our prayer that God will keep Tobias in His presence all the days of his life and that he will be a Champion, victoriously conquering all things that will come his way with God who will surely strengthen him. That his life will always declare the goodness of God and bring Him glory in everything he will do and say.

Are you going through something now that feels as if God has forgotten you and has not taken your situation into consideration? Instead of questioning, seek Him through His Word, trust that He loves you and knows what is best for you, take encouragement in these promises:

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a bright future…” Jeremiah 29:11

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you, He will never leave you or forsake you.” Deutronomy 31:6

“Cast all your concerns on Him for He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7

When you feel forgotten or forsaken, lift your eyes, hands and heart to God and our good God promised that those who truly seek Him, will find Him.

The day the Lord has made.

Jan 3, 2017
I woke up to messages of greetings on my phone and was super excited! I knew it was going to be a great day! Marco had to go to work but promised a birthday dinner. So it was just me and Noah until dada comes home. I thanked God for another year and set out to prepare for the day. I was excited!- then I saw the mountain of laundry- but said to myself- i will wash them tomorrow for today is my birthday. Went down to prepare breakfast for Noah and then saw the dirty floor (added ‘mop the floor’ to my mental checklist) Got cereals, yoghurt, sliced some fruits for noah, sat him on the table, prayed and told him to start eating and will just feed the dogs. Went out and patchi (my oldest shih tzu) still hasn’t come home (it’s been 2 days) :( saw two big piles of poop (i have two other dogs) out front and the puppies (7 days old) not in their beds. (added all that to my mental to do list). Gave the dogs their food and water and fed noah which as always took about an hour. Cleaned up, washed the dishes, saw some more stuff that needed cleaning and cleaned away. Went out, put the puppies back in their beds, washed the doggy dishes, cleaned out the dog poos, sweeped the fallen leaves, cleaned out the front. Went back in to clean the floors. Gave noah a bath, dressed him up. cleaned the bathroom, took a shower cleaned the room. Noah had a snack and ofcourse decided to wipe his hands on the bed and his shirt and so had to change him again. Past lunchtime and I was exhausted and not feeling very excited anymore. But we head out for lunch anyway because I was going to meet one of my best friend. Just as we were leaving Noah had to ride his ‘car’ and accidentally toppled over the water containers on the side of the house. Of course had to fix that too before we left.
Finally got to the mall for lunch (the friend i was supposed to meet- seems to have forgotten and has not answered any of my messages) Not minding it anymore, I decided I was going to make the most of my birthdate with Noah, so I ordered my favorite meal- and then of course my Noah felt like running all around the restaurant and pulling a small boys hand forcing him to play with him, who naturally didn’t want to be pulled. My birthday lunch turned into a crying moment. Quickly finished our food and i decided to just go home. Driving home, Noah apologized, told me he loved me and promised not to do it again and the uto-uto mom that I am suddenly felt better. The friend I was supposed to meet finally texted way past lunchtime to say he was on his way, but we were already on our way home.
Got home and decided to just rest and sleep. Woke up when Marco’s parents arrived (they brought me a cake) but they had to go back to Cebu so had to prepare for their flight. I decided to go back to sleep with Noah. Woke up with a headache. 7pm and Marco was still at work- i had a feeling the birthday dinner wasn’t happening at all and became very disappointed.
As I was writing this I had to stop. I was getting carried away by all the negative things that had happened. So I thanked God for everything He has done for me and has given me. I don’t want to be ungrateful I told God- sure I had a lot of housework to do- but I have a house! And clothes to wash, dishes to wash because we had something to eat! I have a good handsome 4 year old who may have mood swings at times but overall he’s a sweet boy. My husband may not have been there for my birthday, but he was working. Working for our family. Thankful that he has a job. Thankful that I have a sweet, loving husband
Later on in the evening, my dog Patchi- after 2 days, finally came home, walked straight into the living room as if nothing happened! 
By ‪9pm‬, my bestfriend who didn’t meet us for lunch came over and we had some cake and watched a movie, by 11, Marco came home with flowers and a birthday cake with lit candles!
And that was what happened on the 3rd day of this year.
To some, it may have been an uneventful birthday or not even the best birthday, but to me, to simply be alive makes it the best day ever!
Today is January 4, my birthday is over and we’re 4 days into the new year. I am still alive and breathing. I have so much that God has blessed me with that I don’t even deserve. So today even though it’s no longer my actual birthday, I still celebrate this day, for God has made it and has allowed me to still live and enjoy it. I will definitely be glad and rejoice in it!

Sabi nga ng friend ko, ‘everyday is our birthday’- may everyday of the rest of my life shout out the glory of God alone!

Woooohoooo! Thank you Father God 34 years. Each day brings me so much closer to you!

Why so downcast O my soul?

We all have moments when we cannot seem to explain why we are so sad, why we feel so down, so low- that we end up crying! And the worst part is, we don’t even know why we’re crying!
I seem to be getting a lot of those moments recently. I believe I am being attacked spiritually, past sins creep up, guilt comes knocking, feeling of worthlessness, of hopelessness… so what do I when I get attacked?

What should we do when we feel down?


Psalm 42:5 Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.

I turn to God’s Word and I put my hope in Him, in His Promises. I remind myself of what the Bible says and not focus on how I feel. I think of all the things that I don’t deserve, that God has blessed me with- my husband, my noah, my family, this day that I am alive and well! I remember all the times God picked me up and rescued me and how He helped me overcome all the challenges.
Oh I will put my hope in the One True God! The God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. In Jesus, the lover of my soul and I remind myself that nothing can ever separate me from the love of God and that I am more than a conqueror!

When you fill your mind with God’s Word, His promises and assurance of His Grace, there won’t be room for the enemy’s lies.

“What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” -Romans 8:31-39